On Gratitude

In moments of inconvenience or problem, a lot of us (yes, including me) focus and exaggerates on this instance that lasts for hours or days or weeks. We forget all the other good things that happen everyday. I am a work-in-progress in this regard- the trying hard to be positive and grateful kind of person. I am born a pessimist which I believe is okay as it prepares me for the bad things that come but it clouds my emotional and spiritual well-being. I think this is the effect my mom has on me. (Peace, mom!). She tend to focus all her energy on things that annoyed her, or the things lacking in her life, or the news, or whatever sickness she has this hour. We've tried to reason with her for years about "positivity" and "laws of attraction" and "counting your blessings" and all those shit to no avail. She still wakes up every morning with a complaint of some sort.

Feeling like I'm in the brink of getting fed up soon since I'm also fighting my own demons and no longer have the energy to fight hers, I made a Gratitude list...for her! I printed it in the evening and placed it in the freezer door. I also instructed my adopted elder bother and my cousin to point to it every time Mom is having one of "those moments" - which actually happens several times a day. It's a long shot since she voluntarily do not want to think of the things she should be grateful for, it's still worth a try. In the morning, she simply asked what it was which I explained to her but she just glanced at it. Nowadays, she doesn't even notice it anymore. I realized you can't help anyone who doesn't want to help themselves.