My muse visited last night. And with that comes the array of emotions that are too much to keep bottled in. That's what they do, right? Fill you up with so many feelings you believe you will explode with the sheer weight of it.
The year that was. Another year gone. A new year for me. When you stop counting your age, should you stop counting your lessons, too? Especially in things you do not seem to learn or do better? Maybe it's just me. Time has never been my ally.
Let's see how my previous existence molded me into the person I am now. First, I have finally found the courage to stray away from the Medical field. With it came wonderful people who added color to my life. Made things bearable, too. Second, we finally moved in to our own house. Though partially as I'm still living in my parents' house during weekdays. This means I only get to see my son during weekends. You make sacrifices so your children can have the life that they deserve. But what is it exactly that they deserve? Third, I'm writing less and less. My thoughts are always preoccupied to understand what it all means, or how to deal with it. Fourth, I'm seeing my bestfriends less and less. Again, time is not my ally. This may be one of the reasons I'm having difficulties organizing my thoughts. My "support system" is out of reach most of the time.
Lastly, and this may just be the age talking, I have come to realize that dreams don't really go away and that there are lessons you never learn. It stays with you like a shadow, reminding you of how incomplete your life is. No, I'm not complaining. I'm happy. It's just the realization that I can be happier. You make decisions in your life and it alters you in such a way you are unable to comprehend. This I know. This I really know.
The year that was. Another year gone. A new year for me. When you stop counting your age, should you stop counting your lessons, too? Especially in things you do not seem to learn or do better? Maybe it's just me. Time has never been my ally.
Let's see how my previous existence molded me into the person I am now. First, I have finally found the courage to stray away from the Medical field. With it came wonderful people who added color to my life. Made things bearable, too. Second, we finally moved in to our own house. Though partially as I'm still living in my parents' house during weekdays. This means I only get to see my son during weekends. You make sacrifices so your children can have the life that they deserve. But what is it exactly that they deserve? Third, I'm writing less and less. My thoughts are always preoccupied to understand what it all means, or how to deal with it. Fourth, I'm seeing my bestfriends less and less. Again, time is not my ally. This may be one of the reasons I'm having difficulties organizing my thoughts. My "support system" is out of reach most of the time.
Lastly, and this may just be the age talking, I have come to realize that dreams don't really go away and that there are lessons you never learn. It stays with you like a shadow, reminding you of how incomplete your life is. No, I'm not complaining. I'm happy. It's just the realization that I can be happier. You make decisions in your life and it alters you in such a way you are unable to comprehend. This I know. This I really know.
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