i still haven't gotten out of this rut. although i already have a job waiting, i'm planning not to take it. i just wanna rest for a while. stay at home. play w/ my baby sis. write in my diary. read the books i've been putting off. help mom around the house (we currently don't have a maid). finally clean my room...and my life. i miss waking up in the morning and realizing i don't have anything to do plus i don't have to worry about anything. no picking up the slack the next day, or profusely waiting for a text or call that will only add wrinkles to my already worn-out face...and life. no more trying hard not to speak up or shout for that matter. i am just free...at long last. free to express myself, to be myself for a while. i loved what i did for the past 4 years and i'd still do it someday, just now now. not in the next couple of weeks. at least i made the right decision of not having super close friends than those i already have (from high school, college, medicine). at least too, that limits the number of people who really know me (sometimes better than i know myself). a wall is good as long as you know who to put it out to. i know that now.
(Present time: Just wanna remind myself)
(Present time: Just wanna remind myself)
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